Let's all Kill Masaya
by MewTangerine
Summary: You give me ideas, I'll write the oneshot of how Masaya dies. Rated 'T' to be safe.
1. Intro

I don't own Tokyo Mew Mew, and I never will.

I Know I should work on my OTHER two stories before starting a new one, but do I care??

Intro: Let the show begin!

HIYA!! Mew Tangerine here, bringing you a NEW KIND OF SHOW!! It's the……LET'S KILL MASAYA SHOW!!!!

(Applause)

I'm your host, Mew Tangerine, and here's our star!!

"Where am I?" Masaya asks

A secret location. and I'm having all those reviewers review me ANY WAY AT ALL (As long as it's not too gory) to KILL MASAYA!!

"WHHHHAAAAAT??" Masaya screams.

YUP! FUN FUN FUN!!

"Fun for who?" Masaya asks.

Me and the reviewers!!! okay, so you people review with one way to kill Masaya, and I'll write a oneshot story, (As a new chapter) telling the world the ideas AS A STORY!!!

"Are you just doing this because you want people to review??"

No, I'm doing this because I HATE YOU, MASAYA!!

I'll be waiting for all your reviews!!

"Now just wait!! This isn't fair!!"

Life isn't fair, Baka. I'm accepting any idea, just nothing 'M' rated, and they can be as ridiculous as 'Squished by a falling tree' to just randomly dropped dead.

Sooooo…… LET THE SHOW BEGIN!!

Review, and I'll write!


	2. Death By a Tree

I Don't own Tokyo Mew Mew.

Here we are again!!

"That didn't take long…" Masaya mumbled.

NOPE! I already have 8 reviews!!!

"EIGHT??!"

YUP!! This first idea is from **Mew Somomo**

* * *

One day, Masaya was walking through the park.

"All these wonderful trees!! How can some people just cut them down, without thinking

about the tree's feelings?? Why can't the world just get along with the trees? He wondered, like the tree hugger he is.

"All the lovely trees!" He shouts. "I love the trees!!"

just then a bird flies by, and poops on his head. KA-SPLAT!!

"And I love the birds, too!" He announces. "Nature RULES!! I LOVE it!!" Masaya, also announced, now yelling.

Just then some random dude walked by, dropping his garbage on the ground.

"HEY!!" Masaya yelled at the guy, "Pick up your trash!"

"You talking to me, punk?" The guy demanded.

"YEAH!" MAsaya yelled back, "The earth is not a garbage can, you idiot!"

"Oh, really, Hippy-boy?" The dude asked, and lunged at Masaya, beating the crap out of him.

After the guy left, Masaya staggered to his feet and toward a group of trees.

"I LOVE YOU, MISTER TREE!!" he shouted, grabbing the tree in a hug.

Just then, the tree came to life, and said,

"That's way too weird for me." And the tree grabbed Masaya up in its branches, and ate him.

And he wad dead.

* * *

So, what did you think?

"What? That didn't make any sense."

Neither do you. Keep on coming with those Ideas!

PS. Sorry if you think it's pathetic, but hey, It could be WORSE, right?


	3. Death By a Mob

I don't own Tokyo Mew Mew.

WOW!! Already 10 reviews!!

"Ten? Why does everyone hate me?" Masaya whines.

Because you're you. I dunno. I think I need a Co-host for this show. I can't take this REVOLTING company alone anymore. DIMENSIONAL DRAGON! Find me a Co-host.

(Big explosion of Green smoke)

Good Dragon. Who'd you get?

"Hey! Where am I?"

Oh, you got Kish!

"Oh, no! A rabid fan girl!!" Kish shouted, backing away.

HEY! I'm not a rabid fan girl!

"An un-rabid fan girl? They exist?"

YES. You're on my new show.

"Is this another 'Ask the whoever' show? I just got out of therapy from the last one!"

No, it's a show where the reviewers send me ways to kill Masaya!

"Really? That's cool!"

I needed a Co-host. You can announce this chapter.

"Okay! This next idea was submitted by: **Ice The Angel Tiger Mew Mew**!"

* * *

One evening, Masaya was walking down the street. He was feeling upset of how people had littered in the same day.

"And they didn't even pick it up when I told them to!" He grumbled. How RUDE!"

He walked into an alley way, still mumbling to himself. Then, he heard aluminum can fall.

"WHO PUT THE CAN IN THE GARBAGE!!!!?" Masaya yelled.

He stomped over toward the sound.

"You see, girls? I KNEW he'd fall for it!" said a girl, standing in the shadows in front of a crowd of girls armed with pitchforks, toilet plungers, and Hedge trimmers.

"Are you girls my fan club?" Masaya asked, excitedly.

"No. we are…" The girl paused, "Your worst nightmare."

"Huh?" Masaya asked, clueless as ever. The girl who had spoken giggled, and said calmly,

"Get him."

"YAAAAAAHHHHHH!!!!" Screamed the mob, rushing towards Masaya

"EEEEKK!!" Masaya shrieked, sounding like a girl (No offense meant to anyone except Masaya) He ran from the mob of angry Masaya killers, but of course, they kept after him.

He ran down the alley, and out of it, and through the park. He ran like heck, but then he saw….the unspeakable. He saw… something… dreadful. He saw.. _Litter. _Masaya stopped running, forgetting the mob, and stomped over to the garbage on the ground.

Just then, the mob caught him, and messily killed him, and left him lying there with a toilet plunger stuck on his head.

And Masaya was dead.

* * *

So, that's it!!

"That was funny!" Kish laughed.

"Hmph." Masaya muttered.

Whatever. Keep up the reviews!! And I'll try to update soon! Bye for now!


	4. Death by Ducks

I don't own Tokyo Mew mew. I really hate Masaya. This is just for laughs.

Hihihi! We're BACK!!! On the…… LAKM show!!! Otherwise known as: Let's All Kill Masaya!

"Yeah! MTs the host and authoress, but I, Kish am the co-host!"

Don't be so arrogant, Kish.

"I still don't see the point of this" Masaya complains.

You don't need to. This idea was submitted by an anonymous person, codename: DUCK OBSESSION.

* * *

Masaya was out walking down the street one day, thinking tree-hugging thoughts. 

"I love trees!" he shouted. He was not paying attention to the road, and suddenly, he was run over, by a truck delivering…. condoms. (O.o) But unfortunately, he wasn't dead yet. So, he got up and started walking again.

"Oh well, it wasn't his fault. I LOVE EVERYONE! Peace out, man!" Masaya was getting a lot of weird stares from other people. Suddenly, the Telletubbies appeared, and kidnapped him. Then, the Telletubbies decided to rape him, so they did. Then Masaya was so embarrassed, he walked down to the lake to forget his troubles. But then he saw a duck.

"Ducky!!" he yelled. He pulled a chocolate bar out of his pocket. "Come get the cho-co bar!!" he cooed, which was disturbing. Suddenly, there was an ARMY of ducks, who all

wanted a Chocolate bar. Fortunately, Masaya only had one. So the ducks attacked him. But they weren't ordinary ducks, no they were rabid mutant flesh eating ducks!!

"MOMMY!" screamed Masaya screamed. The ducks began devouring him. His death was duck filled. The last thing he saw, right before he died, was Ichigo making out with

Kish, and enjoying it. And Masaya was dead.

* * *

Well, that's the end!! 

'Yayy! Ichigo made out with me!!"

"I guess you liked the chapter, Kish.

"Sure did!"

"What happened? That was stupid!" Masaya complains.

Too bad. Don't forget to review!! Push the little blue button!


	5. Death by a Bottomless Pit

I don't own TMM.

-Insert Radio jingle here- LAKM! Let's All Kill Masaya, brought to you by Mew Tangerine, the red fox mew mew, and certified Masaya hater! Sponsored by my hate of Masaya!

"What? It's a radio show now?" Masaya asks.

No, but it was fun to start it like that. Anyway, Kish you announce the next Chapter idea!

"Okay! This idea was submitted by **XFallenHoshiX"**

* * *

It was a cloudy day. Masaya was out walking in the forest, thinking about trees and nature, like the stupid hippie tree hugger he is. 

"I LOVE NATURE!!!!!!! I WISH I COULD MARRY IT ALL" he shouted, causing a flock of crows to fly away in fright.

"Birdies come back!" he yelled, "I mean you no harm! I'm your friend!!! I WANT TO MARRY YOU"(O.o) He started chasing the crows, and of course, one pooped on his head.

"Ahh! Natural fertilizer!! I stood in the way of the earth getting this little gift!" (O.o) Masaya was so mad at himself for depriving the earth of this small thing, completely forgetting that bird poop ISN'T fertilizer. (O.O;) He was running around is circles, trying to figure out what to do with this dilemma.

"It's my entire fault!! The earth won't be a fraction of an inch better! Oh no oh no!" He shrieked, "I am a disgrace to nature.!! What should I do what should I do, What should I do, WHAT SHOILD I DO!!!"

And wouldn't you know it? He fell down a bottomless pit, and died of starvation. And Masaya was dead. YAYYY!

* * *

That's all! Wow, my chapters are getting short. 

"I died of starvation???? But how??" Masaya asked.

"Because you didn't have any food with you, and you fell in a bottomless pit, stupid!"

Yes, thank you for that, Kish. Anyhows, see ya all next time, on….. –Insert radio jingle here- LAKM! Let's All Kill Masaya!


	6. Death By a Heat Attack?

I don't own TMM. Ok?

LAKM! Let's All Kill Masaya! I would like to announce that I am now uploading in RANDOM ORDER! Not the order of reviews, like I have been! Now, you'll never know which review will come next!

"Yayyy…." Masaya sarcastically mumbles.

Show more enthusiasm! This story has the MOST reviews of all my stories!!!

"Cool!" Kish exclaims. "Which review are we using now?"

We will be using the review from... **Guitar-Blonde-Is-A-Baka **!

* * *

One beautiful sunny day Masaya was walking down the sidewalk toward the park to meet Ichigo...  
...then he tripped...  
...on...  
...a...  
...notebook...

…it was black…

… with skulls…..  
"Huh?" Masaya mumbled as he picked up the notebook. "What's this?"  
'DEATH NOTE' was on the cover of the black book.  
Masaya rubbed his abused tree-hugger head and sat down on a bench, ignoring a sign that said 'wet paint', pulling a recycled pen from his pocket. He checked his environmentally friendly watch.  
TIME: 2:45  
"I needed a new diary anyway!" Masaya exclaimed brightly. "Now let me just write my name in it so no one takes it from me!"  
Masaya quickly wrote down his full name in the book while thinking of how hot he was; than he settled down to wait for Ichigo to show up.  
40 seconds later...  
"Oh, my heart!" Masaya clutched his chest and fell off of his bench.  
And he was dead.

* * *

Tee-hee! This nice person wrote the story for me! I just added a few tiny details, and that's all!  
"What? That makes even less sense that any other chapter!"

"It made sense to me, baka, now don't insult the reviewers, you b…"

"KISH! DON'T SWEAR! Even If I agree that Masaya is a b-a-s-tard, and you just like that everyone hates Masaya.

"How come YOU can say that, and I can't?"

I dunno. See you all next time, on… LAKM! Let's All Kill Masaya!


End file.
